If i come over, it means nothing
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
