Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
His nipple licking is glorious
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