My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I woke up after 12 hours of being wildly intoxicated, got jizz on my face, and woke up in a different bed than I passed out in. My makeup is still perfect. I'm writing Revlon a thank you note.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Randomize
