No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
Randomize
