Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Randomize