So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
