whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
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