I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Randomize