is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
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