These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
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