When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
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