and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Randomize
