I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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