please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
