I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
Randomize