I skipped work to stalk him.
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
