You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
Randomize
