There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
Randomize