id be glad to
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
