do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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