i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
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