quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
