Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Randomize
