We're facebook friends in real life
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
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