omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
i may or may not be watching the land before time
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
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