i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
Randomize
