At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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