I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
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