i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize
