As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Randomize
