It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
Randomize
