did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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