Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
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