i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
