Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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