roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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