i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosι, bitch!
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP ππππ
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