idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
Randomize
