We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Randomize
