You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
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