This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
Randomize
