And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
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