Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize
