i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
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