@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
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