what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
