hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
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