HIV tests are more positive than that guy
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
I got inside last night via doggy door
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
