It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
