They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
She even gives head with a lisp.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
Oh god it's open bar.
Randomize
