Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Randomize